


I Could Make Your Heart Melt (If You'd Let Me)

by floodlitesq



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Intimacy, Multi, Pining, Unrequited Love, happy birthday rocket! ilysm, idk what to tag this, okay so wonwoo is the endgame here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-18 00:19:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16106786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/floodlitesq/pseuds/floodlitesq
Summary: It all starts with Mingyu Kim. Beautiful, awful Mingyu fucking Kim.-(In which Reader has loved Mingyu for as long as she can remember and one... testing... individual named Jeon Wonwoo keeps getting in the way.)





	I Could Make Your Heart Melt (If You'd Let Me)

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE OF THE MOST AMAZING PEOPLE I'VE EVER MET!  
> if y'all dont go and check out gamerwoo on tumblr i'll cry.  
> songs that inspired me to write this:  
> best friend - rex orange county  
> better than me - the brobecks  
> 

Just like always, it starts with Mingyu fucking Kim.

It starts with the warm glint in his eyes every time he gazes your way and the easy familiarity with which he slings his arms over your shoulders, with way he looks at you in the frozen air on your way home each day, with the way that he smiles at you and how your heart speeds up just a touch whenever it happens. It starts with his laughter and how the sound makes you want to never stop listening, the way he says your name, always with a teasing lilt that drives you just a little bit mad because there he is rolling it in his mouth like it tastes beautiful, sweet, and how the shape of his lips makes you want to melt into a fluttering mess and drag him down, down, down, either with you or against you or just somewhere  _near_ you because you can't stand to be away from him, not even for just a moment. 

It's not enough that you've known him since you were both tiny, when you'd claim ownership over the special swing with the yellow cushion in his mother's backyard just because you had the good fortune to be born seven months earlier. It's also not enough to keep you from realising that being his best friend will never stop you from feeling how you do, because everything to do with him is tinged with a bright, fizzy lemonade-glass twinkle that makes you feel giddy on the inside.

Because God knows that when you fall in love with Mingyu Kim, it happens slowly, slowly, slowly. And when you finally realise that you adore him, painfully so, you discover that you're careening hopelessly into a pit of desperate affection for none other than your best friend.

You're utterly helpless by the time you reach age seventeen. And things only get worse from there.

The last day of school before winter break in your senior year would always be one of the best and worst days of your life; you met up behind the bleachers with two steaming hot chocolates in hand as was tradition between the two of you, a smile ready on your face and an unopened packet of biscuits in your coat pocket because Mingyu had never been one to like marshmallows too much. ("I don't get the hype about them. You know they're literally, like, tiny, really sticky pillows made of water and sugar and shit, right? Right? Honestly. I just don't understand them.")

Like always, he'd greeted you with a smile and a hug, and also like always, he'd grin even more appreciatively at not having to break his back just to get close to you. The two of you had hit growth spurts early, it seemed- you'd spent years at a gangly 5'10, praying for everyone else to catch up and feeling acute relief when Mingyu shot up a solid few inches over the summer that he'd spent with his family abroad. 

"Hey," he said smilingly, taking one of the drinks from your hands and replacing it with a hand warmer from his pocket. "So you don't get frostbite and die."

"Mingyu, honey," you began gingerly, hiding a grin and the way your heart shook from accidental contact from his fingers, "I don't think it's too easy to die from frostbite."

He laughed then, eyes crinkling at the corners, setting the hot chocolates down so he could push some of your hair away from your face. Letting his hand linger, he gently traced his fingers over your cheekbone before making as if to move his hand away.

_Your heart sped up. He'd never done that before._

Making a split second decision, you grabbed his hand, pulling it down so that you were holding it gingerly between your two bodies. His mouth went slack, his eyes wide; he whispered your name carefully, and when you edged closer, riding a sudden wave of courage, he didn't pull away.

In fact, it was him that took your face in his free hand and kissed you, softly, right on your mouth.

You didn't know how long it lasted for, but you didn't care. All you could feel was the fluttering in your stomach and the delicate, wonderful pressure of Mingyu's mouth on yours, all you could hear was the blood rushing in your ears and the thump of your heart, and the hot chocolate left discarded on the bleachers smelled so sweet and everything was so  _beautiful._

And when he pulled away, he kept your face cupped in his hands, resting his forehead on yours.

Looking deep into his eyes, you suddenly felt compelled to cry, because  _finally,_ he'd kissed you. Finally, he'd recognised just how much you adored him, how much you wanted to be with him, how perfect he was for you and you for him and everything had fallen into place and you were so damn  _happy._

_At last._

Mingyu spoke then, quietly and reverently.

"Come on. We're going to freeze out here."

Walking home together, sipping your hot chocolates intermittently, was a quiet affair, neither of you speaking much. You were too busy glowing in the aftermath of what had been the best moment of your life.

That day was the last time you saw Mingyu till January- he went on his annual trip to a family friend's house, a place where there was no WiFi, no phone lines, and no possible way for the two of you to contact each other.

You spent the duration of Christmas and New Year in a kind of happy, dreamy haze, replaying the moment of your kiss over and over again, turning it around in your head until it was well-worn like the pages of your favourite book. You'd never forget it.

And when you got back from winter break, you found him standing next to someone you'd never seen before. A boy with jet-black hair, a pair of the most piercing eyes you'd ever seen, angular features and regally high cheekbones, a jawline that could slice paper and a lovely pair of circular glasses to top it all off. A tall, beautiful-looking boy who, if you hadn't been so besotted with someone else already, would have made your heart race. 

Mingyu spotted you first, mouth and eyes spreading wide, long legs sprinting to catch you in his arms like it'd been years since he'd seen you. He shouted your name first and then breathed it softly, staring down at you like you were the best thing on the whole damn planet. 

"I missed you," he said breathlessly. Your grin was so wide you could feel your cheeks almost splitting in half.

"I missed you too," you replied, just as breathlessly. And then he took your hand and said your name and smiled again, and you thought you'd pass out. 

"I... uh... I actually wanted to clarify something with you," Mingyu started.

_Your breath caught. You hardly dared to hope-_ "Y-yeah?"

"That kiss... You know, the one before break-"

_Your heart pounded_. "I do, yeah-"

"I just wanted- I should have met up with you, but you know how we were away and- uh- I guess I just wanted to tell you that..."

_This was it! This was it, this was it, this was it, you could hardly-_

"...the kiss didn't mean anything, right? We were just trying stuff out on each other, we don't actually like each other, right?"

- _breathe._

There was a moment where you stood rigidly in place, staring up at your first love with your smile frozen to your face and your hands icy, stiff in his, while you turned the idea of him not caring about your first kiss over and over in your head.

There was a moment where you wanted to burst into tears. Or cry. Or hit him. Or yell. Or scream. Or all five. 

But instead, you took a sharp breath in, and spoke in the most level voice you were capable of.

"Yeah, absolutely," you choked out, remarkably calm-sounding. "I guess we were just a little too excited, weren't we."

Mingyu beamed and sighed in relief, squeezing your hands tighter and bringing you in for a hug. "God, I was so worried that we couldn't go back to being friends after," he breathed.

You gave him a small smile in response. He hadn't caught on.

"I want you to meet someone! I've known him forever, he just transferred here!" Mingyu pointed over to the unfamiliar boy, who'd been politely staring at anything but the two of you and your reunion. 

Both of you made your way back over, your limp hand still in Mingyu's. "This is Wonwoo! Wonwoo Jeon. He's in your grade, I think." 

Wonwoo grinned shyly at you. You tried your best to return the gesture, you really did, but all you could manage was a perversion of a smile, a grimace that was nothing more than the painful twist of your lips and the crinkling of your eyes in the hope that you could pass yourself off as happy.

Mingyu still hadn't noticed anything was wrong. He stood there babbling to the two of you, and through your dull, numbed senses, you watched Wonwoo gazing at him with a fond adoration and a tiny smile that you'd seen nowhere but in your own face before. You watched him as he laughed and made all the appropriate remarks in all the appropriate places at Mingyu's jokes, the ones that would reward him with the younger boy's friendly punches and twinkling eyes and explosive laughter, and how he fiddled with his hands every time Mingyu touched him, even when it was accidental, and how he'd catch himself grinning softly, sending a self-conscious glance your way every time it happened. Clearly, he knew Mingyu just as well as you did.

Wonwoo loved him too. Didn't he. 

He loved Mingyu just as much as you did. 

The morning bell sounded, the three of you departing for homeroom. Mingyu being in the grade below, he'd never been in the same one as you, but it was with some twisted happiness that he informed you that you and Wonwoo would be together till you graduated. 

As you parted from him, you led the other boy to your classroom, feigning a smile at him and telling him to simply take a seat and tell the teacher his name, that you had to go do something and you'd be right back. 

You quickly left, not turning back lest you burst into tears right there. 

You made it into the girls' bathroom right before the dam broke and you dissolved into the most wretched, sorrowful fit of sobs you had ever experienced. Your entire soul felt as if it was splitting into a million tiny pieces; you'd never known that you could sound as pathetic as you did in that tiny, cramped toilet cubicle one cold morning in January, but there you were, weeping your heart out on the linoleum floor.

It wasn't until the bell for second period sounded that you noticed just how long you'd been crying for.

Making your way to your second period classroom, you tried to ignore all the pitying glances that came your way, deflecting your inquisitive teacher's prying into what was wrong.

You took your seat heavily, head slipping into your hands. The class dragged on and the teacher's droning rapidly became nothing but background noise, all of little consequence to you.

You'd made up your mind.

You hated Wonwoo Jeon.

And that wouldn't change till the day he stopped loving Mingyu.

The months went by in a blur. You spiralled through classes and tests and countless cases of petty drama from other friends with a smile affixed to your face and your heart in a cage of stone, going home and spending night after night after sleepless night thinking of Mingyu and Wonwoo, Wonwoo and Mingyu, and how you didn't have a place with your best friend any more because he had someone brand fucking new. Someone he liked more.

And as much as you would have liked to, considering your circumstances, hating Wonwoo turned out to be a little too difficult for you. Having to spend virtually every day with a guy like him, funny and kind and smart and understanding all in one goddamn parcel, was too much. So you settled with giving up instead.

There was nothing that could soothe the jealous burn that seared your skin every time Mingyu laughed at one of his jokes instead of yours or the ache when he cancelled movie night with you to go with Wonwoo to some random convention that he didn't even know the point of, yet was going to anyway just because he was. It stung like salt in a wound.

But you swallowed your desperation, reprimanded yourself every time you felt tempted to hurl a reproachful remark their way, and for the most part, they remained sweetly, blissfully, bitterly unaware.

The weeks went by and you watched yourself become the rusty, ill-used third wheel in the wake of your best friend discarding you like a child presented with a shiny new toy. You watched as he and the other boy became so much closer than it seemed the two of you ever had been, exchanging inside jokes and smiles meant for each other that you had no part in. Worst of all, you got the privilege of seeing Wonwoo's lovesick simper every time he thought you or Mingyu weren't looking.

You couldn't fucking stand it.

But you couldn't let yourself drift away; Mingyu meant too much to you for you to simply let him go, especially not when that damned beautiful incubus of a Wonwoo was around to steal him from you. Terror wrapped itself in an iron grip around your lungs, and you convinced yourself that this was fine, this was necessary, everything was okay and it always had been. It would be okay. 

And it was, from time to time, because there were small shreds of glee in every misplaced pang of jealousy you felt in their presence. Wonwoo's affections were not reciprocated. You knew Mingyu well enough to know that, at least. But just as much as it made your heart soar, it stirred a twist of unease in your gut. The guy had grown on you- his personality didn't exactly make it easy to hate him. For fuck's sake, he was pretty much perfect anyway, what could you possibly find as ammunition against him?

The answer was nothing.

He wasn't aware that Mingyu didn't feel the same. For all you knew, Wonwoo was living through the same kind of delusions you'd had weeks prior, and if there was one thing you didn't want to see, it was to see him getting hurt on account of this; yet as much as you tried to ignore it, you knew it was coming. It had to.

So when you went on a walk sometime during spring break to alleviate yourself from the brooding slump you'd fallen into, and found Wonwoo sitting on a park bench, glaring at some undefined point in the distance with bloodshot eyes and a sniff you were pretty sure wasn't from allergies, your heart burned for him. 

"Rough day?" you enquired, sitting down.

He snorted and gestured to a couple far enough away to be out of earshot, but close enough to make out who it was. "Yeah. Guess you could say that." 

You craned your neck at his words, trying to distinguish whoever it could be that got him in such a state.

Mingyu. Of course.

And... Sofi Lee, clinging onto his arm and smiling up at him in the exact same way that you'd seen on Wonwoo's face, in the exact same way that he'd seen on yours. A notorious party-goer, thrower and something close in appearance to a goddess, she was the most popular girl in your grade. It made sense that someone as ethereal as Mingyu would be with her.

"Won," you whispered, tugging at his sleeve. He didn't respond.

"Wonwoo," you tried again. It was without looking at you that he answered.

"He kissed me last week, you know. Just came round to my house at 3 a.m. Shitfaced." He paused for a second, inhaling, and continued. "And then I took him inside, since, you know, my parents are out of town. It's not like they're gonna know or anything. You, uh- you know Sofi Lee's party-?"

You did know. 

"He'd just come back from there. He got invited." 

"I see," you whispered.

"So I told him to have fun and all that shit, to drink responsibly, he didn't wanna get into trouble or anything, all that jazz. I didn't hear from him for about, oh, two, three hours? And then he texted me when I was asleep forty times telling me he was coming over. That he had to tell me something."

Mingyu'd always been a lightweight. Of course he'd get drunk at that party, where the alcohol flowed like water and the people moved like waves crashing on the shore. Wonwoo laughed derisively.

"He called me then, and I woke up. Obviously I was like 'what the fuck, man, you can't come over now', but he did anyway. I could barely fucking read his texts. You wanna see?"

You didn't. Wonwoo kept going.

"I heard him crashing at my door and yelling out my name. I swear, he was loud enough to wake up like fourteen people around us, you know? So I ran downstairs and let him in. I took him to the couch and I sat him down, gave him some water, tried to see just how far gone he was. Obviously, he was completely wrecked." He wiped at his eyes furiously, muttering a quick apology to you from the corner of his mouth. You patted his arm softly, both a silent gesture of comfort and a signal to keep going.

"I sat down next to him and he- he hugged me, the fucker, he fucking hugged me and he said that I was his best friend. It wasn't weird for him to hug me or anything, we've done it before, but- I don't know- that night it just felt different. So there he was hugging me and then he pulled back a bit, and I asked him just what the hell he thought he was doing, and- and then-"

"Take your time," you murmured, heart heavy.

Wonwoo said your name in a rushed gasp, letting his words escape his mouth as if they burned him. "He told me I was the most gorgeous person he'd ever seen. He just sat there complimenting me, and I got so confused but so fucking  _happy,_ and then you know what he did? You know what he went and did?" He chuckled to himself, the sound devoid of any humour. "He fucking kissed me. Just. Grabbed my face in his hands and went to town. My neck, too. I had to push him off me and everything because even though I lo- uh. Even though he's, y'know,  _Mingyu,_ I wasn't gonna let myself take advantage of him because he was absolutely smashed and I'm not a disgusting person. So I got him a cover and a pillow and told him to sleep."

Wonwoo drew his jacket tighter around him, casting a look at you to gauge your response. Staying passive was taking everything you had, but somehow, you managed it; he took it as a sign to continue. "I put the cover on him, made sure there was water and painkillers for when he woke up, and then I was gonna go back to bed because I thought he'd passed out. I guess he wasn't asleep after all, because he grabbed my hand and told me he... he told me he loved me. You know, I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. I couldn't stop fucking smiling." 

There was a small pause where neither of you spoke; Wonwoo, it seemed, was collecting his thoughts. When he spoke again, your blood ran cold.

"When he woke up the next day, I asked him how the party was. And you know what? He didn't remember a fucking thing. I thought it was good, that we could start over and I could tell him properly, or maybe he'd tell me or- I don't know. But it doesn't matter any more, because now- well. Look over there and I guess you'll find out why."

Wonwoo pointed to the couple.

Sofi was grinning at Mingyu, mouth moving silently, doubtlessly telling him something sugary sweet, acridly so, and it was enough to prompt him to cup her face in his hands, bringing the two of them nose to nose. Wonwoo and you, watching silently from a distance, knew exactly where this was going. A pit built steadily in your stomach; you willed every divine being in existence not to let this happen.

They didn't listen.

He pulled her towards him and kissed her.

"Oh my God," you whispered softly, turning your head to hide the instantaneous nausea in your gut. Wonwoo opted to keep staring straight ahead, his eyes hard and glassy, even when tears began to spill over his cheeks.

"There isn't anything she has that I don't."

You exhaled shakily. "I know."

"She doesn't deserve him."

"I know."

"I don't get why he'd choose her and not me."

Your heart ached. "Wonwoo..."

"I just don't get-" his voice broke.

"Wonwoo."

"I- I just- I love-"

You couldn't bear to let him finish his sentence.

"-I know. I know you do."

And when the boy on the bench next to you, the one you'd tried to hate since the moment you met him, collapsed into tears next to you, immediately you wrapped your arms around him and held him close to you while he cried.

"I love him so much," he gasped, shaking with despair. You clung to him all the tighter, willing yourself not to cry. Wonwoo sobbed Mingyu's name in a broken voice, clutching the soft material of your sweatshirt.

"I- I'm so sorry, Won," you whispered, feeling tears pricking your eyes. "I'm so sorry."

He raised his tear-stained face to look you straight in your red-rimmed eyes, a sudden flash of desperate intuition prompting him to speak again.

"Did you-"

"-I did. I do." you confirmed. "I love him, Wonwoo," you let out a harsh, humourless laugh. "God fucking damn it, I love him."

Wonwoo's mouth pressed itself into a thin line. "How long have you..."

"I only figured it out this year, but I guess since... well... forever. Funny, right?" Rubbing at your eyes furiously, your voice cracked. "Listen, I'm sorry, this was supposed to be about you-"

"-don't you ever say that," he interjected. "I can't believe you felt this way for so long and I didn't even fucking notice."

You laughed again, drier this time. "Well, you have now. What good's it going to do at this point?" 

Wonwoo placed his head in his hands. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Yeah. Me too."

Sharp shards of humiliation forced themselves into the moment, pricking at your conscience while you held the boy next to you; there was a small, malicious voice the back of your head that staunchly refused to let itself be silenced, piercing and poisoning your thoughts:  _at least he feels the same as me. At least Mingyu doesn't love him either._

Disgust pervaded your mind and you sneered silently. There was no way you'd let yourself think like this about your friend. 

Neither of you deserved this. 

You let Wonwoo cry himself dry, offering your arm around his shoulders for support as you walked him home. You wiped away his tears, brought him his favourite tea from his favourite cafe, and slept on his couch until you knew that he was stable enough to start doing things himself again. While there was no jealousy or resentment towards him, the voice in your head simply wouldn't shut up.  _Where was he when you felt like this? Why were you helping him when he couldn't give anything back?_

Rather than let yourself grow to resent him, you found a release for yourself. 

The morning after his meltdown in the park, Wonwoo woke up with a fresh sense of shame and the smell of baking in the air. Walking in the kitchen with only slight bewilderment, he was greeted with what looked like the site of 400 PTA bake sales crammed into one kitchen.

"Morning!" you chirped. "I made cupcakes!"

He said nothing, staring at the countertop, where you'd set the most successful batch in pride of place.

Your smile dropped from your face at his lack of response, and you quickly began to gather as many trays of baked goods as you could. "Crap, Wonwoo, I'm sorry, I should have asked for your permission before I did any of this-"

Wonwoo cut in. "Yeah, you should." 

You looked at him guiltily, a frown beginning to form on your features. 

"I'm really offended," he continued, hiding a small smile. "that you started baking  _without me._ Don't you know what kind of an offence this is?"

And so the two of you spent the rest of the day making enough food to feed a small army. By the end of it, you were on the couch, bawling your eyes out at shitty romance films. 

If it had been hard to hate Wonwoo before, it was impossibly difficult now. You just couldn't bring yourself to do it.

When school started again, Mingyu disappeared, suddenly unavailable at all times of day and night. You couldn't reach him in school, either; yet anyone could find him in your special spot at the bleachers, feeding Sofi her yoghurt or helping her out with her maths homework. He never sought you out, much clearly preferring her presence to either of yours, and that in itself spoke volumes.

So you two accepted it. You found a new spot to hang out.  You branched further out into Mingyu's circle, finding solace in the gaping holes he'd left behind; two guys, Soonyoung and Hansol, you became particularly close to. And Wonwoo became indispensable to you- on the worst nights where you could barely speak for tears over the boy who'd left you both behind, he was always there to take care of you and pick you up again, and you'd do the exact same for him whenever he was struck by the same longing. Mingyu had been irreplaceable, but he'd torn himself away from you in a frenzy of newfound popularity. Whenever either of you would pass by him in the halls, he wouldn't even deign to cast a smile your way. Hell, he wouldn't even fucking look at you.

Graduation came and went. Mingyu was, unsurprisingly but still bitterly, absent.

Four years of this went by. Four years of radio silence from him, four years spent with Wonwoo and your new friends, four years of a diminishing longing and heartache for a love long lost.

University came without your old friend in tow. Any kind of negative feeling you'd felt towards him was gone, completely replaced with a fond tenderness not unlike the one you'd harboured for Mingyu. You'd ended up getting into the same college, and it really helped, especially with the workload that came alongside your admission; the following year, when you saw Mingyu at your favourite coffee shop, you remembered he'd intended on going to the same school as the two of you. The fact that he got in and didn't even tell you stung more than knowing that he didn't love you back, and then more than ever, you'd needed someone, and Wonwoo was always right by your side in a way that the younger boy never had been. 

In fact, he's right next to you when your phone buzzes with a ringtone you haven't heard since you were in high school.

Wonwoo's eyebrows climb into his hairline, hand subconsciously clenching itself around the remote. "Is that-"

You cut him off. "Should I answer?"

He shrugs.  _Your call._

Your chest constricts as you flash through memories of times spent both with and apart from Mingyu.

_Is it really worth it?_

Your decision comes to you in a split second. With a short, sharp jab, you press the button.

There's silence for a moment, and then his voice filters through. " _H-hello?"_

Wonwoo watches you through a passive mask, surveying your reaction to the sound; he takes in your sharp intake of breath, the biting of your lip and the jiggle of your leg as you bounce it up and down, the way that you fiddle with your free hand in your agitation. "...hey."

Mingyu laughs nervously, a noise that throws you back four years with such strength that it leaves you dizzy. " _Wow, I almost forgot what your voice sounded like... It's, uh. It's been a while, huh?"_

"It's been four years, Mingyu. So yeah, I'd say it's been a while." The venom in your voice is acidic, and you almost spit your words out at him.

He inhales through the phone; despite all the time spent apart, you still know him like the back of your hand.

He's close to tears.

" _Sofi told me I didn't need you. Said that I shouldn't want to be around anyone but her. She got mad every time I even looked at you, heh."_

Eyes wide, your head whips towards Wonwoo with growing realisation.

"Wait, M-Mingyu-"

" _I- we- God._ _She cheated on me. We broke up."_ He breaks down, his sobs filling the silent room. Your stomach twists. " _God, I'm so sorry. I'm so- I'm so, so, so sorry, I can't even begin to- I just- I mean it. You know that? I mean it. I miss you. I miss you so much."_

Every ounce of rage in you dissipates, and you let out a breath you didn't know you've been holding; meanwhile, Wonwoo's face is ashen, stony. His fists clench, but you can see the glints of relief in his eyes.

"Mingyu- Mingyu, sweetheart, it's okay. It's okay. Breathe."

" _I never should have listened to her,"_ he weeps bitterly. " _I spent four years without you. You were my best friend, and look what I did. I have nobody. You hate me. Wonwoo hates me. I'm such a fucking idiot."_

It's hard for you to speak without crying as well.

"Mingyu, don't worry. It's okay. You're okay. Do you want to meet up soon? We can talk it out, the three of us. Do you want that?"

" _I- yes. That would be amazing,"_ he gulps, his breath still ragged. " _God, I'm such a dumbass. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I-"_

"-I get it, man," you cut him off, giggling, albeit slightly painfully. "Do you want to talk to Wonwoo?"

" _Would you let me? Is that okay? God, I'm so-"_

You pass the phone to the boy next to you without another word, letting your face fall slack. Coming to terms with the wild beating of your heart, you tune out of your surroundings, the dulcet tones of Wonwoo's voice slowly becoming background noise until you can barely hear him and Mingyu any more.

The tremors in your chest are not out of a rekindled affection.

They're out of fear.

It takes you a minute to understand why, and when you finally do, dread settles in your chest like ice.

A small smile on his face, Wonwoo hangs up, handing your phone back to you. "We're gonna meet up with him tomorrow in that coffee shop next to the arcade. That okay?"

"Do you still love him."

You don't answer his question, instead letting your own burst out breathlessly. Your voice is abrupt, abraisive, flat and your eyes are cast down, filled with tears you refuse to let shed. Picking at the blanket, your fingers scratch scratch scratch at the material, scrabbling for any, for all distractions to shield you from another heartbreak that you're not quite sure you're ready for. Because in the four years you've spent with Wonwoo by your side, you've fallen truly, madly, deeply, desperately in love, and any thought of him still harbouring any form of romantic affection for Mingyu makes your heart tremble with a terror you haven't felt since you were nineteen.

Wonwoo is bewildered. "W-what?"

"Do you still love him."

His confusion suddenly shifts into desperate rage, some other emotion you can't quite place swirled deep into his eyes, and he laughs derisively, a sound you haven't heard since you found him in the park. He can't even get his words out right.

"Y-you- how can you even think that I- have you not fucking noticed that- I- y-you-"

The tears fall. The dam breaks.

"That you _what_ , Wonwoo?! Huh? That you still love him? I fucking  _knew_ it! I knew I'd never be good enough for you, I-"

Suddenly, you can't get out another word. There's a scuffle and without warning, you're on your back on the couch with your best friend hovering over you, his mouth pressing firmly, hotly, onto yours while fierce tears of his own intermingle with your wet face. His hands clutch onto your face wildly, lips dancing with yours in a frenzy of words yet left unspoken, and it takes your breath away. And all at once, the pressure is gone.

"I can't believe," he pants, with deliciously mussed hair and adoring distraction in his bleary eyes, bruised lips and what looks suspiciously like your lip balm smeared across his cupid's bow, "that you think I don't fucking  _worship_ you."

You sit up, fingers covering your mouth, and gasp in place of words.

"W-Wonwoo, _what_?"

Your lack of ability to speak makes all the anger suddenly dissolve from his features, leaving in its place a fervent, passionate earnestness, and he breathes your name in a reverent tone, gently taking your hand away from your mouth and holding it in his own.

"I love you. I love you so much."

-

Just like always, it ends with Wonwoo fucking Jeon.

It ends with the touch of tenderness in his smile every time he glances your way and the helpless adoration with which he takes your face in his hands and brings it to his lips, with the way he looks at you on your couch or in class or underneath him each day, with the way that he slow dances with you in the evenings and how your face hurts with just how much you're smiling. It ends with his voice and how the sound makes you want to cry and laugh and kiss him all at the same time, the way he says your name, always with a loving lilt that drives you just a little bit mad because there he is savouring it in his mouth like it tastes magical, wonderful, and how the movement of his mouth makes you want to melt into a swooning mess and drag him down, down, down, either with you or against you or just somewhere  _near_ you because you can't stand to be away from him, not even for just a moment. 

Because God knows that when you know you're in love with Wonwoo Jeon, it consumes you, slowly, slowly, slowly. And when you finally realise that he can't live without you, blissfully so, you discover that you're plunging into new depths of euphoric affection for none other than your best friend. 

And there's no way you'd rather have it.


End file.
